107. Female Writer In Los Angeles

Barack and a girl friend of mine and I are sitting, talking about politics. Barack says something and I smell alcohol on his breath and I think it's weird that he has alcohol breath. Then I remember we just had a party. He turns away and on the back of his head there are two nails, one higher than the other. I get really upset and say, I know they got him bugged.

He gets up to go brush his teeth from the alcohol breath and I proceed to talk to my girl friend about a secret government that is conspiring and following him. He comes rushing into the room and says he wants to know all about it, and I am shocked he could hear me from the bathroom.